YOU KNOW YOU’RE OLD WHEN…
(A special thanks to transman for suggesting this post, and for allowing me to steal my comment from his post [here]).
You know you’re old and really ARE reading just because it’s transman’s post when you look at a picture of cute Johnny and cute puppy and only wonder why he’s wearing two watches…
There he is, with his soulful eyes and his casually shaggy hair, being held by the world’s most gorgeous man–hah! Gotcha, didn’t I? But really, two watches, Johnny? What am I missing?
The kid (I’m old, I can call him a kid) is obviously younger in this photo, so maybe it had to do with his 21 Jump Street character, a role which I only heard about from my sister after extolling to her his Edward Scissorhands portrayal. Where was I from 1987 to 1990 when Jump Street was on? Oh yeah, pretending I was an alcoholic. But 1990 is also the year ES came out. I don’t know, my mind is a bit foggy about that period. Also, now that I’m officially old, things sometimes get misplaced in the file cabinet that is my memory, shuffled–unsuspected– to the wrong folder.
being the weird person I know I am knowing me as I sometimes do, I would have been more likely to watch a movie about Vincent Price creating a son with scissors for hands instead of just another cop show. But I have mourned ever since not having enjoyed Johnny in his youth. In my youth! Well, okay, so I wasn’t young then, either, but I wasn’t OLD like I am now.
Why does the kid have two watches on? Really, paralaxvu? Take your eyes off the brown spots and wrinkles on your hands and LOOK AT THE KID! Who became the Avon lady’s shrub trimmer (um, can I say that?), who became the pirate, who became the headless horseman, who became the chocolate factory owner, who became Angelina’s phony tourist (really, he was the only good thing about that film)!
The answer, as I now see–having cleaned off my bifocals–is really very simple. He’s wearing two watches because he’s wearing two watches. He can wear as many watches as he wants. He’s Johnny Depp.
And I am old. *sigh*
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